I love JavaScript. Don't get me wrong, I do think it's incredibly versatile and creative.
But I CANNOT STAND its overuse. This is my one and only bugbear with Gmail, which is otherwise absolutely awesome. However, this rant isn't about Gmail.
It's about WordPress. How can any of you stand it? I'm about to smack my monitor into kingdom come. I had wondered for ages what it was like (since so many bloggers use it) but I'd never been quite game enough to use it here and upset the status quo. I'm so very glad I never did. It's evil.
I'm now a contributor on another blog and the administrator uses WordPress... and ugh. It hangs my browser non-stop while executing who-knows-what scripts doing goodness-knows-what. Sheesh, ALL I WANTED TO DO was paste some HTML to embed a video. But nooooooo. That's too hard. This has turned my ten minute article into nearly an hour. And still, it looks like I will be unable to grace the article with the fair Lee Lin Chin's news report.
Rant finished. I now return you to your regularly-scheduled program. Carry on and feel free to use JavaScript to your hearts' content.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
In which I extol the virtues of bubble shooting
As predicted, there are a lot of variations of Bubble Shooter in the search tracking. But in a new development there's now "dead whale bubble shooting". Uh, nice.
And someone's looking for "insect bite vacuum eBay". Is there actually such a product? In the words of Sean Connery, I'll buy a dozen.*
There are a fair few Bingo Marker searchers landing here. Welcome! We'll pretend for a moment that you meant to arrive! Same with the people who were after the motorbike and stonehenge cakes, and the mayor who scaled the ladder to rescue the sunbathing dog.
My proudest moment for today is being the top result for "my crazy dance salta nallen". Even if just for a moment. Even if I have no clue what it's about, it doesn't matter. It's all about the glory.
* on SNL, of course.
And someone's looking for "insect bite vacuum eBay". Is there actually such a product? In the words of Sean Connery, I'll buy a dozen.*
There are a fair few Bingo Marker searchers landing here. Welcome! We'll pretend for a moment that you meant to arrive! Same with the people who were after the motorbike and stonehenge cakes, and the mayor who scaled the ladder to rescue the sunbathing dog.
My proudest moment for today is being the top result for "my crazy dance salta nallen". Even if just for a moment. Even if I have no clue what it's about, it doesn't matter. It's all about the glory.
* on SNL, of course.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Alright Team!
Here we go!
Today's episode is a story all about me. You'll have to excuse the odd grammatical snafu - searchers CLEARLY pay no attention to my story-writing needs. (Clears throat.) Let's begin.
Pleased to meet you - my name is Mark Nolan.
Evidently, today I must be wearing odd panties. I think those are the kind where one leg-hole doesn't match the other. They're also known as Sims 2 panties. Well, nobody ever accused me of being a fashion tragic, since I'm actually a Romanian truck driver dancing.
My job involves nude pics of Coles Supermarket, Dubbo. Quite often, after work, I'm known to wanking wrap it in tissue no mess.
In my spare time I pretend to be a disabled lady given a mermaid tail. Or if it's a slow day, I often switch to happy religion, and footprints are carved into the floorboards by monk who has prayed at the same spot for 20 years. (Editor's note: This one wins the "longest search string" award for the week.)
Before I go, I must tell you one last snippet about myself. My proudest achievement for the year so far: I am presently the #1 Google result for "gargantuan lactating whale". Now I'll be able to sleep at night.
Today's episode is a story all about me. You'll have to excuse the odd grammatical snafu - searchers CLEARLY pay no attention to my story-writing needs. (Clears throat.) Let's begin.
Pleased to meet you - my name is Mark Nolan.
Evidently, today I must be wearing odd panties. I think those are the kind where one leg-hole doesn't match the other. They're also known as Sims 2 panties. Well, nobody ever accused me of being a fashion tragic, since I'm actually a Romanian truck driver dancing.
My job involves nude pics of Coles Supermarket, Dubbo. Quite often, after work, I'm known to wanking wrap it in tissue no mess.
In my spare time I pretend to be a disabled lady given a mermaid tail. Or if it's a slow day, I often switch to happy religion, and footprints are carved into the floorboards by monk who has prayed at the same spot for 20 years. (Editor's note: This one wins the "longest search string" award for the week.)
Before I go, I must tell you one last snippet about myself. My proudest achievement for the year so far: I am presently the #1 Google result for "gargantuan lactating whale". Now I'll be able to sleep at night.
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